YOU FAILED!!!

I feel the need to sympathize with all of those out there who, like me:

That pretty much wraps it up for me right there.

BTW, how are you all?  It's been a while since I posted something here.  School is over now, though, so…. yeah.  I'm doing well, thanks for asking.

So my word count for this November was… subpar.

(BWAHAHAHAAAA!  Who are you kidding, Watzzit?  It was TERRIBLE!)

It wasn't THAT bad.  I mean…

(Shall I recite it for your readers?  Let them be the judge of that?)

Uhhh… I really don't think that's necessary, mysterious voice in my head.  Is that you, Jenny?

(5,471)

…

(…)

…

(…)

I told you not to do that.  Seriously, though.  Ethan?

(No, you pooter.)

…Rachel?  Shirla?

(IT'S SER YOU IDIOT!)

Oh, wow.  Hi Ser.  You usually don't talk to me.

(That's because you're usually too busy being a class-A moron.)

Why, thank you.

(Not a problem.  Now, about your pathetic word count.)

We don't talk about my word count.  That's none of your business; it's not even your book.

(THAT'S WHY I'M UPSET!!)

Oh.  I guess that makes sense.

(Stop changing the subject.)

Sorry.

(Did you even try this November?  I mean, that's barely 10% of your word count goal!  If only you had made an effort!  I mean…)

Hey, I didn't see you doing much when you were writing your Master's Thesis on energy wavelengths a few hundred years back.  School does things to us.

(For your information, while I was writing that paper, I was also flossing, cleaning my dorm, fighting a demon from the Underrealm, giving a man open heart surgery, supervising a magic-probe into the uncharted seas, and playing Kingdom Hearts on my 3DS.  Simultaneously.)

Well, we can't all be amazing.

(*snicker snicker*)

Anyways, as I was explaining to my readers before you so rudely interrupted…

(Rude interruptions are my specialty.)

…Failure is something we learn from.  Like a hard test in school, or a bad sports game.  When we fail, we shouldn't berate ourselves, or get upset, or curse life and everything about it.  Instead, we come up with…

EVIL PLANS!!!

So here's my EVIL PLAN to do NaNoWriMo next year.

1)  Pick some other month besides November to do NaNo in (such as July or June, when I have no school)

2)  Do NaNoWriMo in that month

3)  Win NaNoWriMo in that month

4) In November, upload previously-finished novel and win

5)  This is not cheating because NaNoWriMo does not stand for National November Writing Month.  It stands for National Novel Writing Month.  Nowhere is November mentioned.

IT'S FOOLPROOF!!!!

Now that I've scared all the small children away….

Don't feel so bad if you didn't make it to NaNoWriMo greatness this year.  There's always next year.  Plus, who said we need an excuse to write, anyways?  I, for one, will write my little heart out all year.

Booyah.

That is all.

Watzzit Tooyah

(P.S.  Tell him to write about ME more, readers!  It gets lonely and cramped in his tiny mind.)

NaNoWriMo: Almost Over

By now, if you're participating in NaNoWriMo, you probably have lost all sanity in your mind where your characters rule your thoughts, day and night.  Day and night!  All that occupies your mind is this one thought.  "Almost over.  Almost over."




November 1, day one of NaNoWriMo:
Feeling confident and happy with your word count goal and your characters.  Everything is going according to plan, your characters and your plot are getting along nicely.  You have high hopes for November.






November 15, halfway into NaNoWriMo:
Your characters are a mess, you're sleep deprived, and quite frankly you don't know if your novel is going to turn out as you expected.




November 30, the last day of NaNoWriMo:
Your characters have gone somewhere, (you don't know where and whether they'll come back or not) mad at you for making them an empty shell, your plot is exactly like that movie you watched last weekend, and if you're real honest with yourself, you are absolutely ecstatic that it's almost over.






 December 1, no more NaNoWriMo:
You are so overjoyed that the torture is over, feeling like you've accomplished nothing in the past 30 days.  All the joy, the love, the happiness, and craziness the past month that you have deprived yourself of just flows out of you like the tears you shed when your main character wouldn't talk to you.  In other words... YOU ARE HAPPY!!!  And you don't care what people think of you. 
 




Hopefully this inspires you in the last days of November.  Most of all, remember the gif above.  It will inspire you to keep on .  Keep on for the craziness, people!  YOU CAN DO IT!!!

-Angelina Zoe

atouchofrandomness.blogspot.com

NaNoWriMo with guest character Ty Skyy

A Word 
From Ty Skyy, Main Character of Ty Skyy’s Guide To Life

Okay, listen up people. Some person told me that there was a big event happening where you write stuff on this website called NaNoWriMo (I think it stands for Navel NoRuns Wrinkle Monday. Something like that). You like, write a book in a month and all that (why on earth would you want to sit down long enough to do that?).
SO LISTEN UP PLAYAH! 
I got some info for you to use battling that ugly guy that whispers in the back of your head ‘You can’t do this! You can’t do ANYTHING!’ while his beard hair tickles your brain stem! First of all, GIVE INTO YOUR TEMPTATION! What do I do when I want to be inspired (I don’t write books or anything, but I need inspiration just like everyone else, okay?)? I eat stuff I’m not supposed to. I eat candy. Yeah, I said it. Mom, please don’t read this. In fact, if you’re reading this just stop right here and don’t read anymore cause there’s gonna be some pretty long held secrets being blown out (cause it’s the internet, and that’s what you do on the internet.).
Secondly, you shouldn’t be ashamed of someone reading over your shoulder. If they start to read over your shoulder, froggy them in the nose. Do you know what a froggy is? You make a fist like this:

Then you punch them in the nose. I call it a froggy because the person you punch makes this little face and goes CROOOOOOOOAK! 

So yeah. That helps.

So anyway, third thing and the very last and very important, if you don’t write, then you don’t win. Everybody wants to win. Those who don’t win are a losers. Do you want to be a loser? No, no one does. At least, I hope that’s your answer, cause it’s mine.

—Tyler Skyy

NaNoWriMo Approaches!!! Advice on how to keep going through November and onto victory.

(P.S. If you've never heard of NaNoWriMo before in your life, or if you are wondering what freaky manga Japanese animé video game us writers are talking about (as I did when I first heard of it), visit ywp.nanowrimo.org.)

NaNoWriMo
aka "National Novel Writing Month", "Oh boy...", and "Oh goodie goodie!"

Some people hate NaNoWriMo (I know some people). Some people love it (meeeee!!!). Some people hate and love it (Angelina Zoe...hint hint...). Why? Because writing a novel in one month is the hardest thing you will ever do in your life. But if you like a challenge, then this is the month for you.

So, your biggest question is: HOW DO I GET THROUGH NOVEMBER WITH A MINIMAL AMOUNT OF BLOOD ON MY KEYBOARD?!?!

Allow me to help you!



Pre-NaNoWriMo

Before November comes (and it's a little late now, but at least you'll know for next year, or else stuff everything you can into one week), you should plan your book.

Yes.

No, you should.

No, you're not one of those people who run around in a happy world where planning isn't needed.

YOU NEED TO PLAN.

*sigh*...I am a non-planner as well, my friend. But this passing month, I've discovered planning doesn't have to be boring.

You see, I'm all in NaNoWriMo this year. I've thought hard about what I want to write, and I've come up with a pretty awesome book idea (in my opinion, ahem-hem). So, I decided to plan it, because I always get stuck in the middle of my unplanned books.

First, I made detailed bios of my characters. I described them up to their nose hairs, gave a basic personality I wanted them to own, and created their history. Of course, I left some parts up to my imagination; I never try to overthink my characters, or else they adopt the dreaded puppet syndrome. You have to make up enough of them to where they actually have form and thought, but not so much that they don't develop on their own as well.

After that, I made a general outline of the book, highlighting the biggest points in the novel. I managed to fit this all on one page, and I was pretty proud of that. Just jot down the big scenes you want in your novel, and piece them together. Sticky notes and poster-board is a good way to do this. I've never actually tried it, but I figure it'd be pretty awesome. I just organized my scenes in my head as I wrote them, and only messed up once. So I circled it and drew a little arrow thingly over to where it was supposed to go.

Here's a picture of my general outline. Don't bother trying to read it, I coded the secret parts, and plus it's backwards. But if you do manage to read it, I commend you. That's impressive.

So. That worked very very well for me. Next, I sat down and wrote detailed synopses of each chapter. Now you may think you should have a set chapter number, but I wouldn't worry about that. I just write it and write it and end it when it ends. In my chapter outlines, I write in casual shorthand (thus implicating frequent uses of "like," "duh," "AHK," and "lol :)") in this form:

__

bob wakes up from horrible nightmare / freaks out / goes to girlfriend's house to talk about dream / she's all like, you're a weirdo and dumps him / bob goes home sad

__

Of course mine are usually longer than that but you get the gist. I think this format gives me space to breath. If I detail it too much, I get bored with the book before I even start writing it. This gives me a lot of elbow room to experiment and change things if they get a little crazy.

Now, you just have to STAY INSPIRED! My favorite way to do this is to visit Pinterest! I look up all sorts of pictures based on my novel. Searching "character inspiration", "story scene inspiration", "action story inspiration", "story conflict inspiration", etc. comes up with some really good stuff. If this isn't your thing, try talking about your book to your friends/family, or reading books similar to yours. But most of all, STAY POSITIVE. You can do this, because YOU ARE AWESOME!!!

Now go out there and WRITE!!!

—AC

Author Interview: Jake Buller of "Teenage Writer"

Greetings from planet novel, writerly homedogs! Today we have a very special guest with us: Jake, the fedora-and-trench-coat-wearing blogger of Teenage Writer and author of numerous novels, including The War Horn, his first published work. We have worked hard through tight schedules and busy months to get this interview to ya'll (oh NO!...now you know I'm southern...), so let's give Jake a big WELCOME!!!

WELCOME!!!

Hi, Jake, and welcome to The Writer’s Block! We’re very honored to have a real live published author on the blog. Tell us a little about yourself...

Well, that’s a complicated answer.  To quote the excellent children’s movie Megamind, “I had a fairly standard childhood,” which is to say that it wasn’t fairly standard at all.  I’ve lived in a number of different cities in the Midwest, but I’ve always been rooted in Kansas.  (I am of the opinion that it is the best state in the Union.  Their motto is “through difficulty to the stars” in Latin.)

My “home” when I’m in the States is a farmhouse that turned a hundred years old last year and was built by my great-great-grandfather Tobias.  I’m rather proud of that fact, which is one of the reasons I use the pen name J. Tobias Buller when I’m writing.

I do, however, live in West Africa – I just got back from a visit to the States on the 25^th of September.  The next two years of my life will be spent here in Africa.

How did you get started on writing? What was your first ‘role model’, if any?

I’ve been writing for as long as I can remember.  I still have little “books” I stapled together when I was seven about astronomy and dinosaurs and such, and notebooks full of drawings and half-finished stories.

I think the first writer that really got me going on writing was probably Christopher Paolini, although in the long run Tolkien has been hugely influential on me.  My mom was definitely the one who kept me going, though.  Without her, I wouldn’t be a writer—or a reader, for that matter.  She’s the one who taught me how to read.

So, I’ve been to your blog and I’ve noticed you have quite a lot of writing projects going on! What’s it like to be writing so many books at once?

While I definitely have a lot going on, I try to only write one book at a time.  I have a lot of books in various stages of brainstorming and outlining and revising, but only one novel where I’m actually writing the rough draft.  (My current project is Tornado C, which is a rather odd working title that came out of nowhere.  I hope to finish the rough draft before the end of October.)

It’s hectic, more hectic than I want it to be.  Sometimes the mood comes on me and I have to scribble down thoughts to use later, and things get cluttered.  Eventually you just have to choose your battles and focus on one project.

You seem mostly wrapped up in your upcoming book Tornado C right now. Can you give us a little sneak peek?

It was hard to choose a scene, but here’s a quick glimpse at my villain.

--

        Commander Dakor, however, was briskly moving on to other subjects.  “How bad were the losses?”

        “My source said that it was nearing half, sir.  As a result, Sub-General Percidon called a retreat.  They lost much of the northwestern banks of the Vandar.”
        The commander cursed.  “The devil!  I ought to have him whipped before his men—and I would wager his men wouldn't mind it either, after putting them through a purgatory like that one.  But Percidon has one blasted foot in politics and wouldn't be rooted out for anything.”
        “He's Lady Yionna's beau after all, sir.”  Chathaz shook his head.  And as the daughter of the Baron of Grand Corva, she wielded considerable influence with her father.  Enough to get her fancy a giant promotion with zero effort.
        “Hang her.”  Commander Dakor stood up abruptly and paced in front of the couch. “She doesn't know a splinter about war—doubt she's ever had her dainty toe in real dirt, either.  But the women are the neck that moves the head, they say.” He turned back to Chathaz.  “What about prisoners?”
        “There's seven of them, sir, with more at the front.  There's a sizable amount, despite our losses.”
        The commander grunted.  “Good.  What did you order?”
        “Interrogation.”
        “Hm.”  The short, barely-audible noise was enough to make Chathaz's gut twist a little, and the neutral expression on the commander's face confirmed it: the commander disapproved.  True to form, the commander wasn't happy with the decision—Chathaz ought to have known.  At least he had delayed torture for an hour.  And he supposed an hour's delay was all he could ask for the poor souls.
        Commander Dakor turned his back to the brazier.  “Have our interrogation officers change methods.  Start with threats.  Move on to more persuasive methods if necessary.  Branding and needle torture are authorized.”
        Chathaz bit his lip and forced himself to say, “Yes, sir.  Understood.”  But not approved.  Then again, he didn't have to approve his commander's decisions in order to carry out his orders, did he?  He had done what his conscience dictated and delayed torture.  That was all he could really do.
        “Send a message tonight,” Commander Dakor continued.  “Sub-General Percidon is to be transferred to the Twenty-Second Brigade.  Fenderkort is to temporarily assume leadership of the Sixteenth, who are to rest for the next three days before being reinforced with more men from the draft.”
        Chathaz nodded appreciatively.  “Very good, sir.”
        A bit of a smile hovered at Dakor's lips.  “It is, isn't it?  The Twenty-Second is a more prestigious command for the prestigious Percidon...but currently in the reserves.  At least that bremmed gentleman will be able to play soldier without hurting the war, for a while.”
        Abruptly, the commander gave a wave of his hand.  “You are dismissed, Captain.  Any further news must be relayed to me immediately.  And remember—those orders must be sent tonight, as soon as possible.  Don't stop to chatter with some airheaded militiaman.”

What inspires you to keep writing, even when you’re stuck?

There are a lot of different things that keep me going, but I think the biggest thing is the theme of my novel.  Because the novel is coming from my heart, I can’t not write it.  It’s part of me, part of what I believe about how the world works.  So when the prose isn’t flowing and I’m frustrated, I flip back through my novel and find new energy to keep on writing.

What is your favorite aspect of writing a novel (i.e. outlining, brainstorming, characters, etc.)?

Well, brainstorming is definitely the easiest, but I think that finishing a novel is one of the most satisfying feelings in the world.  Of course, you always have to revise it later, but for a little bit you feel relieved and elated that it’s finally done.  I think that’s a universal feeling that every writer strives for.

Okay, silly question time! What’s your favorite fictional character ever, and why?

What an awful question!  How am I supposed to choose?

If I really have to, though, I’d probably choose the Doctor from the British TV show Doctor Who.  He’s such a complicated and wonderful character, unlike any other characters in any show I’ve seen or book I’ve read.

Last of all, Jake...how do you overcome writer’s block?

By writing.  You’ll write awful prose for a while and the words won’t flow, but really, writing is the only way to get over writer’s block.  Even if you have to break all the rules of writing just to get words on paper, at least your novel will be written!  There’s room for revision later.

And you’ll find that after a little bit, writer’s block won’t pinch you so much—and later on, when you look back over what you wrote, it won’t be as bad as you remembered.


* * * * *

We can't thank Jake enough for helping us out with Writer's Block. But we can still try! THANKS JAKE!!!!